Many would like to understand how to work with their shadow but are unsure where or how to start. Opening a dialogue with your Shadow allows a deeper understanding that leads you to more creativity, empowerment, authenticity, and your soul purpose. Shadow is anything that you have stuffed into a corner and not allowed yourself to look at. It is like a splinter in your foot that won’t go away or prevents you from doing something you love. Here are questions you can journal with to begin a dialogue with your shadow for a better understanding.
1. What triggers you? Sally (fictional character) went to work and became very angry at the sight of the new woman working the register. — When you become angry or even happy just by looking at someone, you are reflecting a shadow aspect of yourself onto the other person.
What is actually causing the anger; why are you really angry?
What memory from your past feels like this situation?
Who do they remind you of, you or someone else?
What small grain of truth about yourself is being reflected back from this person?
2. What thoughts do you shoo away? Sally began worrying about her taxes, and immediately shooed the thought away. — If there is something we don’t want to look at and refuse to think about, there is a good possibility it is a shadow aspect.
What is the first memory you have around responsibility and/or money (or your worry that you shoo away)?
What were you told about money or responsibility?
What belief isn’t really yours that you are ready to let go of?
What is your inner truth around responsibility and money?
3. What is stopping you from doing what you want? Sally always wanted to be an actor but every time she thought about it she heard a little voice that said, “That’s silly, acting is pretending and it isn’t a serious profession you can’t make a good life with acting!” Or how about, “It is impossible to (insert yours here) because you aren’t smart enough, strong enough, good enough, pretty enough, etc.
Whose voice did you hear say those words when you were younger?
Can you see their insecurities or fears and realize they are not yours?
What loving words can you replace them with?
Your soul, your higher self want you to succeed and have your heart’s desire. What loving message would your soul or higher self say to you?
When you have worked through any of these steps in your journal, allow love to pour through you (from your higher source) for the work that you did and radiate it out to any and all that may have been involved in the situation.
Forgiveness is an important key to integrating your shadow, both forgiving yourself and forgiving others. Integrating your shadow is very important to living an authentic life.